So when I got in at freaking 2 AM, I did the logical thing and took out my contacts and got distracted reading email on my way to bed. About 10 minutes later I said to myself... I've got to take off my contacts and get to bed... and I must really be drunk because I can't seem to get anything in focus across the room! Then I went into the bathroom and started taking out my contacts... again... except you see, there weren't any contacts in my eyes. I realized this when I put a phantom contact into the contact case that was full of solution and I thought... Hey... Wait a minute, I've already done this. Yep, I'm a champion.
Work is going to be a breeze today!